Below is the result of an orange pill orgy involving myself, two old-fashioned country club types, one curious billionaire, a Romanian dancer, and an incredible view of Central Park from the 48th floor of a W. 57th Street apartment.
I showed up hauling an 80-pound gift that I worried was out of place for such a fancy domicile. Even the doorman combed over it with suspicion. “It’s not a bomb,” I assured him. It wasn't a powder keg, but a quarter barrel keg of New Glarus beer from Wisconsin. And it was a hit. Everybody loved it, neglecting the aged whisky in its pretty glass decanter, and in some telling forsaking the fancy wine too. Instead it was a scraped metal barrel of delicious pee-colored liquid sloshing around a kitchen floor and making smiles. My only regret was not stopping to buy some red plastic Dixie cups on the way. The apartment was mostly empty of furniture save the living area, but what we made of it felt like a writer’s room might, everybody throwing out theories, strategy, plots, etcetera; except the protagonist of our story was bitcoin, and the villains anything that might stand in the way of its escape velocity. I learned a bunch. Here’s the billionaire’s full bitcoin portfolio:
- SunPower, Enphase
- Intel
- Riot Blockchain, Marathon Digital with OTM LEAPS calls sold on both
- Short Gold via ETF
- Long silver via ETF
- Long bitcoin with 25% on an LN channel. 25% in cold storage. 50% on Celsius where half is used to collateralize a loan, the proceeds of which are spent hosting several S19 miners through Compass Mining, with earnings going directly to the LN channel.
- Cash held in stablecoins at 8.8% APY on Celsius which is enough to both cover inflation and service the bitcoin loan. This can also be used for any out-sized BTC dips (-50% or more)
- Real Estate (land and homes) in Puerto Rico
All the above makes up over 80% of his entire portfolio. The rest was the apartment I was standing in, Apple, and Amazon stock. The apartment building was designated special tax status (421-a exemption), and the stocks allow for quick loans whenever cash is needed, which means he avoids selling the stock and causing a taxable event.
So that’s a peek into what the other side is up to, kinda beautiful in its simplicity. Anyone care to decipher this portfolio for us?
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