My parents are very worried about my mother's impending retirement and I didn't want to hear anything about it.

Right now, I'm at my parent's house for dinner. My mother got a phone call from a colleague. My mother is scared that she won't have money to retire. The colleague was talking about putting his money into Tesla stock or something. Whatever.

I couldn't hear it. I was unable to hear it. I had covered my ears. I briefly had money in Bitcoin on several occasions. I tell this to people who don't know me and they tell me "You LOST it!" No. I know information security best practices. I never "lost" anything. I feel unable to save money because of my family's nonsense.

I've tried saving money! I've tried getting commercialist things out of my life. My days are just too difficult to handle without hobbies, though. I'm stuck in my apartment all day until my mother takes me out for drives. Being stuck in my apartment, I think of past traumatic events.

I have room in my apartment for one "retro" personal computer. So I built one and I tried to cram everything that I could in it. It all works, but I'm faced with so many limitations as a result. It's a Super Socket 7 computer build, which is recommended if you want to condense 1990s Windows gaming and earlier DOS gaming into one computer. The limitations have been becoming very apparent on the DOS side of things. Well, sourcing the components, planning the build, building that computer, troubleshooting that computer, installing Windows 98 Second Edition as efficiently as I could, and playing games on that computer have sure kept me occupied.

I used to post on this community under several other accounts. I've deleted all my past accounts.

Because of my family, I can't have a job and I can't have a car. Doing anything outside of my apartment depends on my mother. I need her to take me food shopping, for instance.

I'm on disability benefits and I'm going through school. I just got an associate degree last year and in September, I'll be starting an online computer science bachelor's degree program. My disability keeps me eligible for the Total and Permanent Disability Discharge for full relief from federal student loans.

I plan to get off benefits after I'll be done with school and after the monitoring period from the Total and Permanent Disability Discharge will be over.

I had a summer and winter job with my community college, but I just had to provide a letter saying that I no longer worked there so that I could continue receiving my SNAP benefits, which are for food.

All my life, my father has been obsessed with money. My family used "money" as an excuse to force me to be unable to live on my own. "You're not going to invest!", they'd say. "My father died PENNILESS!", they'd say. "You'd be NOTHING without your mother!", they'd say. I just want to live a normal life.

Thank you so much for reading.