Hi all! This is my third Money Diary, I’ve written them about every six months - last November and this past June.
At the end of the summer, my boyfriend and I broke up after a little over 2 years together. It was amicable and relatively mutual, but absolutely a hard decision to make. Neither of us felt like the relationship was fun, exciting, or “right” anymore - felt like more work thann anything I realized I loved him in a lot of ways but maybe just not… enough? But it was still extremely hard to pull apart our lives that have been so intertwined. I still love him in some ways and want to stay friends. More about that later.
We lived together for another month after breaking up (would not recommend, lots of tears) and I moved into my new apartment in October. I also started a new job in October. Lots of changes!
I’ve noticed I get some similar questions about my savings amount, getting into product management, and switching companies frequently. Here are some answers to those questions from previous diaries:
I’ve loved this community for resources and learning, so I hope I can contribute to that as well. Feel free to ask more questions on those topics (but those are the general answers)!
Section Zero: Context
I'll answer most of the questions from my last diary, but try not to copy/paste big chunks of text. I'll add if anything has changed.
What do money and success mean to you? What are your end goals?
Breaking up with my boyfriend and moving out meant that my financial situation changed. I now pay $2,200 a month for rent instead of just $1,100. I absolutely could have found roommates or lived in a cheaper part of Brooklyn, but at this point, for my mental health I wanted to live closer to my friends (who also live alone) and prioritize an apartment I love, close to the train and other things I want to do (gym, bars, coffee shops, etc.).
Right now my goal is to make it through the end of 2022 saving around 10-15% of my income. This is significantly lower than the 50-60% savings rate from the past couple of years, but it’s worth it to me. I want to take a break from being so focused on saving and enjoy my life, especially after a difficult time with my relationship ending.
I vacillate between wanting to retire as soon as humanly possible and read, travel, take long walks, take up punch needling, improve my snowboarding skills... well, I vacillate between that desire and the desire to be a successful woman in technology and a role model for younger women.
The nice part about FIRE is that I can decide which one I want as the option to actually retire gets closer, and the salary I get for my job function and where I live is an incredible help to how much I can save.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My dad has worked in finance since I was about 10. He’s always been really knowledgeable about both higher-level economic concepts and the minutiae of personal finance. My family is frugal, too: we clipped coupons and got clothes on super-sale at Kohl’s and Goodwill.
Did you worry about money growing up?
Yes. While we were comfortable, we lived in such an affluent place that our family was in “the middle class” of the town and it made me worry more about money than I probably needed to. Think The Stepford Wives for context.
Are you a spender or a saver?
Still a saver, but making more money has helped me loosen the pursestrings for myself a bit. It's okay to buy clothes for myself, it's okay to order takeout, etc.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
In college, I became maybe 80% financially independent as I had a scholarship and worked part-time during school and over the summer, but I was still on their insurance.
Now the only thing I depend on my parents for is my phone bill, and they generally pay for food when I go home. If I were really in a pinch they’d loan me money, which is nice to know, but I hope to never have to take them up on that.
If you could go back in time, what's the one piece of financial advice you would give to your past self?
Learn about investing, look up the terms you don’t know, and start doing it as soon as possible. Ask questions to people you know or on the internet.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
I'm set to inherit 50% of my grandmother's estate when she passes, but it’ll likely go to my uncle instead, who is on disability. I’m not sure how it will all work out but I have no qualms “giving up” any money she leaves me for him.
Section One: Assets and Debt
Investment balance $220,000
- Retirement (includes 2 company 401ks and 1 rollover IRA): $92,000
- Brokerage: $58,000
- Roth IRA: $39,500
- Managed account: $20,700
- HSA: $9,500
- Crypto: $700 (all in Bitcoin, this is up about 50% from my cost basis)
This is up ~$40,000 from this past June, but was calculated at the end of November before the market started dipping a bit. It’s probably around $215,000 as of the day I’m posting.
Equity if you're a homeowner
N/A, I rent in a HCOL city. Still no plans to own anytime soon
Savings account balance
$10,153
Checking account balance
$1,483 in checking account for bills
- With my new apartment I pay rent in good ol’ fashioned checks, so I consolidated my checking accounts into one. This balance is after paying December rent.
Credit card debt
Currently $3,686 on my credit cards, but I pay them all off in full each month.
My parents signed me up for a credit card as soon as I was old enough and taught me about how important it was to pay in full. In fact, I think this was so hammered into my brain that doing anything other than that each month was never an option. Because of this, I’ve always thought of credit cards as similar to debit cards—only spend money you have.
Student loan debt
I was fortunate to go to college on full scholarship (combined between merit-based scholarships and financial aid), including living expenses.
My undergrad institution is a no-loan school, so any financial aid from the university was given in grants. Highly, highly recommend looking at the list of no-loan schools if you/your child is looking at college soon.
I studied psychology and sociology, and graduated without any student loan debt. This is absolutely one of the reasons that my financial picture looks the way it does— I am not playing on hard mode.
Section Two: Income
Main Job Monthly Take Home $7,182/month
Deductions
- 401k: $1400/mo.
- Medical: $69/mo.
- Dental and vision: $11/mo.
Income Progression
I've been working for 4.5 years and have almost quadrupled my starting salary.
- Age 22:
- I started in customer support right out of college, making $40,000/year + overtime, which ended up being about $52,000/year (thanks OT!).
- Age 23:
- I moved into an entry-level product role at the same company and received a raise to $60,000/year.
- About 6 months after my first product role, I moved to a new company for a half-step promotion where I was making $82,000/year + 15% yearly bonus. The bonus was dependable enough that it was assumed as part of our total compensation, so let’s call it $95,000/year.
- Age 24:
- Early 2020, I switched companies again for a promotion and made $122,000/year.
- Age 25:
- January 2021, I received a cost of living/inflation/merit (?) raise to $128,000 and was promoted to Senior PM a few weeks after that.
- A few weeks ago I got a more significant raise to $150,000/year.
- Age 26:
- In September 2021, I got a new job as a Product Manager for a small raise to $154,000/year.
- My benefits (insurance, 401k match, stock options) are significantly better than my old company, and this company’s prospects are much better as well. My total compensation is the equivalent of around $180,000/year if I include a conservative value of my stock options.
Side Gig Monthly Take Home
I very, very occasionally babysit through UrbanSitter, which is an app where parents post babysitting jobs. I think I’ve only taken 2 jobs in the past 6 months, though, and have made about $200 between both of those jobs.
Section Three: Expenses
Rent
$2,200 for a 1 bed, 1 bath apartment in a residential part of Brooklyn. I’m close to my friends and a bunch of train and bus lines so this is the best location I could have asked for.
Renters insurance
I haven’t gotten this yet for my new apartment! I gotta get on it.
Savings contribution
I try to have about $10,000 sitting in my savings account at any given time, because it makes me feel safe in case of an emergency.
Investment contribution
Until September-ish I was contributing about $2,500 per month to my brokerage account and Roth IRA. With moving out and having higher expenses in terms of rent, therapy, etc. I’ve decreased this, more like $500 a month right now.
Donations
I mentioned in my last MD that one of my major goals for 2021 is to step up my donations and create an actual strategy around them, potentially involving a donor-advised fund. I started a sinking fund for a DAF, but that and my sinking fund for angel investing basically got wiped out when I had to pay a broker fee (NYC apartments woo!), security deposit and rent on this new place.
I’m a little disappointed I can’t meet savings and donation goals I had for this year, but it’ll be fine - taking care of my own situation is important.
Gas/electric
$25/mo, might go up with winter
Wifi
$47/mo
Cellphone
Yep, still on my parents' plan.
Subscriptions
I pay for the budgeting software YNAB (You Need a Budget) which is $84/year. I pay annually in September.
Medical
In November 2020 I had to go to the emergency room, and I actually started a spreadsheet with all the medical bills from it, whether they had been billed yet (or just an EOB), whether I had paid and how much. According to my trusty spreadsheet, so far I've paid $688.03. This includes a partial payment for the ambulance, the hospital doctor fees (not general hospital fees), and a follow-up with a specialist after the visit.
I just got the finalized bill from the hospital (last week, a full year later!), which is $1001. I’ll pay in the new year.
Therapy and medication
I started going back to therapy in September after the breakup, and thankfully the therapist I used to see in 2019/2020 had some slots available. I love her!
I pay $220 per session with her (weekly), which I start getting partial reimbursements for after my insurance deductible of $1,000. I should get ~$250 back in reimbursements for this fall’s sessions sometime early in 2022.
I’ll have to hit the $1k deductible again starting in January, but that’ll happen after 5 sessions.
I also see a psychiatrist and take Zoloft daily for depression and anxiety. (This is a new prescription as of the breakup, but I was pretty explicit to tell the psychiatrist that I didn’t want a prescription if it was just for the breakup. I’ve had lingering anxiety/depression issues since high school but have never addressed them. I feel a lot better now.)
My psychiatrist is in-network, so I only have a $20 copay for each session with her. Those are monthly right now, but could be only every 3 months if my medication is working fine. My Zoloft (generic) is $10 for a 30-day supply, so my total psychiatry cost is $30 max a month.
Day 1
Sunday, November 28
9am
Wake up, munch on a chocolate muffin for breakfast.
9:30am
Walk to a coffee shop close by, get a latte. I sit and read my book for about an hour. (Side note, baristas in Brooklyn are so used to oat milk now that sometimes they do a double take when I say regular milk. It makes me chuckle!) $5.75
11am
I decide I really need to buy some pants that actually fit (pandemic weight gain) and take the train into Manhattan. I stop at Old Navy and buy 2 pairs of jeans that actually fit - yay! $55.98
1:30pm
Get back to my apartment and eat leftover Chinese food for lunch.
2pm
I decide I want to get some exercise so I take a long-ish walk. It’s pretty chilly but I like the brisk weather.
4:15pm
I go to a bar down the street with the express purpose of flirting with bartender who I got flirty vibes from the last time I went with friends. Turns out he is just exceptionally friendly and talkative with everyone (and has a girlfriend).
I read my book at the bar and still talk to all of the bartenders. They’re watching Nathan for You on the projector because it’s pretty quiet other than me (I mean a Sunday afternoon at a cocktail bar, yeah).
6pm
I had already planned to hook up with my ex tonight, and I’m a little disappointed about the bartender situation that I definitely built up in my head. My ex comes to the bar and we have a drink and talk about our Thanksgivings. We get along great, really care about each other and it's hard for both of us to completely cut the other one out of our lives. I pay for us, I got 3 cocktails over sitting there for a few hours and he had 2 beers. $54
8pm
We go back to my apartment and have sex. Welp, it’s what’s happening right now and it’s okay!
11pm
Once he leaves I watch the remaining episodes of Selling Sunset and make a Daily Harvest bowl. It kinda sucks (I guess both the show and the bowl. Anyone completely over Christine? I feel like that’s probably a popular opinion. I actually do enjoy the show and when they actually talk real estate, but it’s getting so one-note.)
11:34pm
Since I was so unsatisfied with my Daily Harvest bowl, I order McDonald’s via Doordash and catch up on Youtube vlogs while it’s coming. Once I get back up to my apartment and open it up, it’s the wrong order… sad. I still eat it but since it was like $20 I chat with Doordash and they end up refunding me.
Day 1 Total: $115.73
Day 2
Monday, November 29
8am
Wake up, shower.
8:55am
Go to grocery store! It’s right around the block from my apartment, and pretty quiet because it’s Monday morning.
What I bought:
Dried mango, green beans, brussels sprouts, spanish vegetable soup, chicken tortellini, kielbasa, chicken pate, bagel crostini crisps, 2 boxes of Kraft mac n cheese, chocolate chip cookies, hard kombucha, instant oatmeal, applesauce $88.51
On the way back I reload my Dunkin app with $5 and get a large latte and donut. $5
10:30am
Email my parents updates to Christmas itinerary, and order Drano on Amazon with Christmas gift card from my uncle (we celebrated early over Thanksgiving!).
11am
Order 3 bras from Thirdlove. Feeling like I’m buying a TON of shit, but the last time I bought new bras was also from Thirdlove 4.5 years ago and they’re falling apart. A much-needed purchase! $115
Also, does anyone else need to put their headphones in to focus even if they’re the only one home?
1pm
Overwhelmed at all the emails I am marking as read. Every so often when I’m annoyed with all the email lists I’ve signed myself up for I shake an imaginary fist at the email marketing managers who don’t think about how their email subject lines will look in someone’s inbox. No friend, your email will not stand out if it’s just another BLACK FRIDAY DEAL YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS headline.
2pm
Therapy appointment! $220
5:30pm
After my last meeting ends I prep brussels sprouts, put them in the oven, then start boiling water for tortellini.
8pm
Walk 10 min to a powerlifting gym I just joined and wait at the front desk… after 10 min the coach doesn’t show up for my orientation and I’m peeved. I email asking to reschedule and he responds basically saying “the barbell side is on the other side of the gym, sorry I missed you” I’m like ...bro. Not off to a good start here.
9:15pm
Buy Storyworth and set it to send to my mom’s email on Christmas day. I’m so excited to read the stories she and my dad write! $89
I want to have a Christmas cookie party for the holidays so I start researching recipes online.
9:45pm
My mom emails me back about Christmas plans and I buy 3 tickets for the Brooklyn Botanic Garden Lightscape - yay! $115.83
10:30pm
Decide to pull the trigger on a Nuuly membership for the next few months for a work trip and New Year’s Eve. It’s so fun to pick all the clothes! I’ve done Rent the Runway before but got tired of the deteriorating quality and higher prices. $68
2am
I get hooked on watching a lovely homesteader’s Youtube channel - she’s in Washington state and is so sunshiney and inspirational! Here’s her channel.
I drink some hard kombucha while I watch, which I would absolutely not recommend (tastes like seltzer but even less flavor, if that’s possible). Problem is I somehow don’t go to bed until 2am…
Day 2 Total: $701.34
Day 3
Tuesday, November 30th
8am
It’s payday! Wake up around 8 with a terrible headache. Take a shower, am immediately freezing when I get out of the shower in my drafty apartment, etc.
9:15am
Open my Dunkin app and realize I have a free coffee drink! I add a large latte with regular milk, vanilla and hazelnut. It would be $4.89 but it’s free!
Dunkin is a 2 minute walk from my apartment and I practically bound down the stairs to get in the fresh air. Have you ever noticed that fresh air helps when you have a headache or are hungover? Definitely helps for me.
9:20am
They have my coffee right when I walk in so I’m in and out. Fingers crossed this helps my headache even a little.
10:40am
I’ve been working on some product spec documents for the last hour and no dice--my headache is basically unbearable now. I Slack my boss, our product designer, and my engineering team that I’ll be off for the rest of the day.
2pm
I’ve been asleep since probably noon. Wake up and am somehow nauseous now? I can’t tell if it’s something I ate or that I actually need to eat. Stumble out of bed and grab some grapes and dried mango.
5:15pm
Wake up again, head still pounding. I would be on my way to a sign language class at this time but there’s no way I’m making it today.
8pm
Wake up again, putz around on my phone for awhile.
11:30pm
I’ve been in and out of sleep all day but I finally turn the lights off in my apartment and go to bed for real. Easy to have a no spend day when you sleep the whole time!
Day 3 Total: $0
Day 4
Wednesday, December 1
6:15am
I wake up to my alarm for a dermatologist appointment this morning, but I’m exhausted and still have the remnants of that headache. I use their text feature to cancel (sorry derm! See you in 2022!).
8:30am
Wake up again and feel like a new woman! Woohoo! I need to 1) stop going to sleep so late and 2) get a full night’s sleep as many nights as possible.
11am
First meeting of the day with an external vendor. Our relationship with them is a little tenuous but I like our main contact there, he makes me laugh.
12:30pm
My Nuuly order arrives along with an order of some home goods (Stendig 2022 calendar, wooden basket, metal clock). The UPS guy is cheerful and it makes me smile.
1pm
Into a few hour block of meetings. I have standup with my engineering team, a design review with our product designer, and a few 1:1s.
4pm
Done with meetings for the day and into my “heads down” block for the next couple hours. I work on hammering out our team success metrics and testing some engineering work.
5:45pm
I see on the Amazon app that my stop is next so I run downstairs to meet the driver. It’s a few minutes before she walks up but when I open the door she goes, “oh! It’s like you were waiting for me!” I didn’t want to be creepy and say I was, but… I was! Drano received. She wishes me happy holidays and is as cheerful as the UPS guy. So nice!
I try on my Nuuly clothes and 2 of them don’t fit at all, even though I tried my best to match my size to the reviews people have already left. Oh well.
7pm
Buy a ticket for the Nutcracker at a local dance studio in a couple weeks - I’m so excited! I danced in a production of the Nutcracker when I was growing up and the music gives me the best nostalgia. $30
9pm
Run my rent check down to my landlord. She’s very quickly becoming like my second mom and it’s so nice to move into such a welcoming building. $2,200, but included in monthly expenses above
11pm
Try to get into bed at a reasonable hour. Read my book a little bit and turn off the lights around midnight.
Day 4 Total: $30
Day 5
Thursday, December 2nd
8am
Wake up, decide I can shower later today.
9am
Order Dunkin on the app, reload with $7. They give me the wrong donuts which makes me sad. Oh well, still a fun breakfast treat. $7
9:30am
I’m heads down working on prepping engineering work for a sprint meeting in a couple hours. Since I started this job recently, I’m taking over projects from my manager, who ran the team before I joined.
10:30am
The doorbell rings and I run downstairs to get it but it’s just my landlord ordering McDonald’s Doordash (lol). Sometimes they ring all of our bells. She ends up telling me how when she first moved into this building, she lived in my apartment! And she tells me about how she and her husband met which is so sweet.
11:30am
Doorbell rings again and I run down. I’m expecting a rug and it’s finally here! It’s huge - 9x12, which I somehow hulk up the 3 floors to my apartment. It’s heavy, but long and thin so it works to carry alone. I leave it in my front hallway to deal with later.
1pm
Start my block of meetings - they all go well! My immediate team is really welcoming and supportive, which is awesome.
3:30pm
Have a meet ‘n’ greet with a finance person who ends up trying to use the casual chat to add significantly more work to my plate… sorry sir, no.
4:15pm
I am closely following Josh Duggar’s trial, so I switch between Reddit and Twitter and The Sun for coverage. (Sorry work.)
5pm
I’m going on a business trip next week (lol, I feel like I’m 45 when I say that) and I need to get a Covid test tomorrow. Searching for all the locations I could get them in Brooklyn just gives me decision paralysis.
6pm
Make some kielbasa with green beans for dinner. While that’s cooking I move my furniture around, unwrap my rug and lay it out in the living room. I love it!!!
7pm
My best friend comes over to help me bring a big box up to my apartment. It’s a chair for my living room. My landlord has been holding it in her basement level apartment for the last few days so we say hi.
7:30pm
She leaves, I turn on Youtube and put the chair together. I decide that tomorrow night since I have no plans I want to go to the movies. I buy the Regal Unlimited membership since I want to see 2 movies and movie tickets are super expensive in NYC. It’s $23.50 for the month and what I don’t realize is there’s a $.50 surcharge for each ticket you book on the app. What the heck! Anyway, $24.50 for two movie tickets
10:30pm
I get really hungry again and want to order Domino’s, but tell myself I have food here and I should eat leftovers or make something else. I decide on toast (butter and jam, yum!) but don’t have any butter in the house. Ok, ok, the only logical option is Domino’s. $20.83 for two medium pizzas, delivery fee and tip.
Day 5 Total: $52.33
Day 6
Friday, December 3
8am
Wake up, shower, debate where to get coffee.
9am
I go to a new bagel spot but it has a cash only sign on the counter. I only have $3 on me but a $20 at home, ugh! Walk to a different coffee shop, get a latte and chocolate croissant. $10
9:30am
Back home and start on work. I’m updating some decks for upcoming presentations about our 2022 product roadmap.
10:30am
My mom emails with the tentative Christmas itinerary we started, she put it in a Google Doc so I check out the changes. I also get an email that I get a free large popcorn and drink combo from Regal, which I can use tonight! Woohoo!
12pm
My meeting block starts - first a 1:1 with my manager.
1pm
Get out of my 1:1 and all but one of my other meetings have been cancelled. Is this… a Friday afternoon miracle?
1:15pm
I need to get Covid tested and have a negative result for my trip next week. I walk 10 minutes to a local pharmacy that had good reviews on Google Maps and wait in line for a test.
There’s a woman there yelling into her phone in Spanish and getting someone on the line to translate for her to the clerk. It makes me sad because she seems so stressed.
My test is free for me (they’ll bill insurance) and they say I’ll get my results tomorrow morning.
3pm
Once I get back from my test I plug away on the roadmap a bit more, then have my last meeting of the day which is a casual coffee chat with a guy on our People team. He has really positive, welcoming energy and it always makes me smile.
I get an email from Areaware that the salt and pepper shakers I signed up to be notified for are available. They’re from Dusen Dusen, a local Brooklyn brand, and are pretty expensive but I’m obsessed with them. $88.84
3:45pm
I crack open a hard kombucha to wind down from work and continue working on some documentation. Especially later in the afternoon, I feel like I can write better just a little bit buzzed… Ballmer Peak, anyone?
5pm
Heat up the rest of the kielbasa and green beans. I’m so excited for my double header movie night!
6:45pm
Head out to the train, a short walk from my apartment. It would be $2.75 (paid with Apple Pay on my phone) but it looks like the OMNY reader didn’t charge me.
7:20pm
Get to the theater and realize I don’t have my wallet! Yikes. The employee needs to see my vaccination card and ID, and thankfully I have my vax card on the NY Excelsior app. I ask if I can show him something else with my name on it and he accepts my insurance card, which I randomly have a picture of in my email. Whatever works I guess!
7:30pm
I get my popcorn and lemonade. Note to self: even if they give you a large popcorn for free, it’s way, way too much for one person. I ate probably 25% of the bucket and couldn’t do any more.
First movie is called Try Harder! which is a documentary about high-achieving high school kids at Lowell High School in San Francisco. Opening weekend this weekend - I really enjoyed it and laughed out loud several times. Teenagers are hilarious and these kids are going through a lot. Go check it out!
9:40pm
Second movie - Encanto, the new Disney Pixar movie. Super sweet and some wonderful, wonderful representation. A family member has visible OCD characteristics, a sister is incredibly strong and looks “stereotypically masculine” - ugh I loved it. Teared up. Reminded me of how seen I felt when first watching Inside Out.
11:30pm
Get a text on my way out of the theater - my Covid results are back! It’s negative, which is not surprising but a relief.
Swing by Walgreens before getting on the train to get some Christmas candy. One bag each of Reese’s trees and Kit Kats - yum! $9.23
Take the train home, $2.75
Day 6 Total: $107.82
Day 7
Saturday, December 4
8am
Wake up! I’m supposed to go to a make up ASL class today and to my rescheduled powerlifting orientation. I have this overwhelming urge to shirk both of these things, partly because I’m exhausted and have a bit of a headache (again).
When this happens, I always go back and forth between whether I’m being irresponsible or whether it’s okay to take time for myself. I’m going to a concert with one of my best friends tonight, and have a super early wake up time for my flight tomorrow, along with grabbing some snacks and toiletries from my trip and packing. It’s now clear to me that I’ve way overbooked myself.
I rationalize that I know the teachers of both events are already there for either other students or classes, so they’re not traveling just for me. I email both and cancel/reschedule.
9:30am
Get up and go down to Dunkin for coffee. Get a medium latte and sausage croissant. I reloaded my DD card with $10 for this trip. $10
10am
Download the Zoom recording from another ASL class that got sent out this week so I can watch it on the plane tomorrow.
12:30pm
Spend some time writing out this diary and my headache is going away. Yay!
3:30pm
Putz around my apartment for the afternoon. I shower, finish a library book, do laundry, and pack. I make a pretty exhaustive packing list and check it off as I go - this trip I’m trying to take care of my health better than I usually do, so I make sure to bring my water bottle, pack my snacks into baggies, and Emergen-c.
4:30pm
Run to the grocery store for travel snacks. I get dried mango (a staple for me) and some Ritz crackers, as well as sandwich bags and butter to have on hand. $16.30
6:30pm
Walk to the train to go to dinner. $2.75
We go to a surf n’ turf place close by the venue, I get a margarita and a burger and fries, my friend gets mezcal on the rocks and fish and chips. My friend is coming off a work trip so she can expense dinner. She also bought the tickets for us - but I bought our tickets for a NYE show, so it all comes out in the wash.
7:30pm
We walk the 10 minutes to the venue and stand around for a few minutes because no one’s on yet. I walk past the set list and realize the opener hasn’t even gone on yet - we’re both being old farts and don’t want to stand another hour for the headliner to come on, so we walk to another bar. I get another margarita and my friend gets a beer.
We don’t make the $20 card minimum this bar has so I ask the bartender just to charge me the $20 minimum if that works (instead of $11) and he seems very stressed about that, goes and talks to his manager and finally comes back with a check for $15 instead. We are very confused but I tip $4 and we walk back to the venue. $19
8:30pm
Back to the venue for the headliner! We’re seeing JORDY who is an up-and-coming pop star (mark my words!) and a really high energy performer. It’s our second time seeing him and he was so great!
9:45pm
Show is over and I hustle back to the train to get home, since I have a 6am flight tomorrow and at least an hour to get there too. $2.75
11pm
Home, packed, last of my clothes in the dryer - ready for my 3am wake up call. Night!
Day 7 Total: $50.80
Spending
Food/drink: $242.62
Clothing: $238.98
Gifts/events: $259.33
Home: $88.84
Medical: $220
Transportation: $5.50
Weekly total: $1055.27
Reflection
When I was doing the totals, it’s clear to me that I’m making a lot more comfort purchases than I used to. (I also did some Black Friday shopping for clothes and home stuff that wasn’t included here.) I could beat myself up over that, but I tend to be so exacting about saving money and denying myself things that I’m trying to find a middle ground.
I’d say this was generally a high spend week for clothes and gifts/events, and I don’t expect to spend ~$250 in those categories every week. I usually spend more in the home category, though.
One thing I’m definitely excited to do less of is go to Dunkin for coffee. My parents are getting me an espresso machine for Christmas, and I’m super excited to pick up all the add-ons (grinder, steamer cup, beans) so I can make good coffee at home.
I'm not super proud of all the things I either cancelled or rescheduled this week, and it's a good lesson for me to avoid overbooking myself (I think I try to stay busy to avoid feeling sad).
Overall though, I do feel like I’m in a good place right now, thanks to therapy, medication, good friends, a cozy apartment and being gentle with myself. I also really love my new job and am excited to see where it takes me.
Thanks so much for reading!
