Tuesday, March 17, 2026

The Daily Market Flux - Your Complete Market Rundown (03/17/2026)

Our platform aggregates and organizes all relevant market news, helping you stay informed, up-to-date, and knowledgeable without spending hours sifting through headlines.

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Here is Your Complete Market Rundown (03/17/2026)

Crypto Events

XRP Surges Past $1.60, Overtakes BNB in Market Capitalization

XRP rallied 10% to reach $1.61, flipping BNB in market rankings as open interest rebuilds toward pre-crash levels amid retail buying activity and strong technical support holding.

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SEC and CFTC Issue Joint Guidance Declaring Most Crypto Assets Not Securities

The SEC and CFTC released landmark joint guidance clarifying that most crypto assets fall outside securities laws, ending over a decade of regulatory uncertainty. The framework specifically excludes staking, airdrops, Bitcoin mining, and wrapped tokens from securities classification. This represents the SEC's first formal definitions for crypto asset categorization, establishing a clearer token taxonomy and regulatory boundaries for the digital asset industry in the United States.

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PayPal Expands PYUSD Stablecoin Access to 70 Countries Globally

PayPal has officially enabled its PYUSD stablecoin in approximately 70 countries, adding 68 new markets to target global payments expansion.

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XRP Surges to Fourth-Largest Cryptocurrency as Ripple Expands Brazil Operations

XRP has overtaken Binance Coin to become the fourth-largest cryptocurrency by market capitalization, reaching its highest price in a month. The rally comes as Ripple announces plans to seek payment licenses in Brazil and Australia, positioning itself as the region's only end-to-end institutional crypto provider. The company is launching its full financial stack in Brazil as RLUSD stablecoin adoption accelerates across Latin America. Market analysts note unusual dynamics, with reports of Goldman Sachs accumulating XRP amid broader selling pressure. Liquidity on Binance has spiked significantly, with reserves increasing by 2.78 billion XRP, fueling speculation about potential price movements above current levels.

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Ripple Pursues Major Brazil Expansion with Custody and Payment Services

Ripple is aggressively expanding operations in Brazil, seeking central bank approval to offer custody, payments, and brokerage services targeting institutional crypto adoption.

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CFTC Grants Phantom Wallet No-Action Relief for Derivatives Market Access

The CFTC issued a no-action letter to Phantom, a self-custodial crypto wallet provider, clearing its path to regulated derivatives markets and signaling a softer regulatory stance toward digital wallets.

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Macro Events

Australia's Central Bank Raises Rates 25 Basis Points in Split Decision

The Reserve Bank of Australia increased its cash rate to 4.1% in a closely divided vote, with five members supporting the hike amid persistent inflation concerns and geopolitical risks.

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Geopolitics Events

Trump Says NATO Allies Decline Involvement in Iran Military Operation

President Trump announced on Truth Social that most NATO allies have informed the US they will not participate in military operations against Iran. Trump characterized NATO as "a one way street" and claimed US forces have decimated Iran's military capabilities, including its navy, air force, anti-aircraft systems, and leadership structure across multiple levels.

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Israel Strikes Iran's Strategic Infrastructure, Reportedly Kills Security Chief

Israeli airstrikes Monday reportedly killed Iran's security chief and targeted strategic sites. Israel's defense minister pledged continued attacks on Iranian infrastructure, marking a significant escalation in regional tensions.

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US Counterterrorism Officials Resign Over Iran War as Conflict Continues

The Director of the National Counterterrorism Center resigned, stating Iran posed no imminent threat and expressing inability to support the ongoing war. A top aide to Gabbard and senior counterterrorism official Joe Kent also departed over the conflict. Analysts suggest the war will require either the collapse of Iran's Revolutionary Guard Corps or a negotiated deal to end, with observers noting the administration may have underestimated the challenge.

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OpenAI Partners with Amazon Web Services to Supply AI Tools to US Government

OpenAI has signed a deal with Amazon Web Services to sell artificial intelligence services to US government agencies and federal workers, according to the Information.

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U.S. Embassy in Baghdad Faces Heaviest Attack Since Iran Conflict Escalation

The U.S. embassy in Baghdad came under intense assault on March 17, with rockets and at least five drones launched from multiple locations around the city, according to Iraqi security sources. The attack, described as the most severe since the U.S.-Israel war with Iran began, targeted the diplomatic compound and logistics center near Baghdad airport. Defense systems intercepted incoming projectiles as sirens sounded across the area. The U.S. embassy issued urgent warnings for Americans to leave immediately as Iran-aligned militias escalate operations.

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Trump Reschedules China Meeting for Five to Six Weeks Out

President Trump announced a reset of his delayed China trip, stating the meeting will now take place in approximately five to six weeks, marking a rescheduling of previously planned diplomatic discussions between the two nations.

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Trump Struggles to Build Coalition as Iran Strikes UAE Energy Targets

Iran launched attacks on energy infrastructure in the United Arab Emirates in retaliation for recent escalations, strikes that sources say Trump was warned about despite his claims otherwise. The administration is struggling to form an international coalition to escort ships through the Strait of Hormuz, with European allies rejecting participation in the proposed naval force. Trump publicly criticized the UK and other allies for refusing to join the effort, highlighting growing tensions in transatlantic relations as the energy crisis deepens.

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Trump Says US Iran Operations Nearing Conclusion, Exit Planned Soon

President Trump stated Tuesday that US military operations against Iran concluded largely within two to three days, with full withdrawal planned in the near future. Trump claimed Iran would have deployed nuclear weapons within 24 hours of acquisition, though the US is not yet ready to completely disengage.

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Trump Predicts Sharp Oil Price Drop When Iran Conflict Ends

President Trump stated the US-Israel war with Iran will conclude soon, forecasting oil prices will "drop like a rock" immediately following the conflict's end.

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Senate Advances Trump-Backed Voter ID Bill Despite Democratic Opposition

The Senate began debate on the SAVE Act, a Trump-backed bill requiring Americans to prove citizenship before voter registration. Senate Republicans pressed forward despite Democratic opposition and uncertain prospects for passage. House members sparred over the legislation, with Democratic Representative Ted Lieu criticizing the citizenship proof requirement as Trump urged Republicans to pass the measure.

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Germany Rules Out Military-Only Solution to Iran Conflict

German Foreign Minister Johann Wadephul stated that relying solely on military action to resolve the Iran conflict is unrealistic. He emphasized that controlled regime change in Iran is not feasible and warned that chaos in the country would not serve German interests.

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Russia Arms Iran With Drone Tech as Pentagon Ramps Up Kamikaze Drone Production

Russia has supplied Iran with upgraded drone technology and satellite intelligence on U.S. force locations in the Middle East, according to Wall Street Journal sources, in what officials view as Moscow's effort to prolong regional conflict while gaining strategic advantages. The development comes as drones targeted the U.S. embassy in Baghdad, with at least two intercepted by C-RAM defense systems and a third striking inside the compound. In response, the Pentagon announced plans to mass produce Lucas, an American-made kamikaze drone modeled after Iran's Shahed design, following its recent use in strikes against Iran.

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US Embassy in Baghdad Faces Intense Rocket and Drone Assault

Multiple rockets and explosive drones targeted the US Embassy and diplomatic facilities near Baghdad Airport early Tuesday, activating C-RAM air defenses. Iraqi security sources described the coordinated attack as the most intense since hostilities with Iran began, marking a significant escalation in regional tensions.

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Iran's Basij Force Commander Gholamreza Soleimani Killed in U.S.-Israel Attack

Gholamreza Soleimani, commander of Iran's paramilitary Basij force, was killed in a U.S.-Israel attack, according to Iranian state media. Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps confirmed his death, attributing it to what they termed an "attack by the American-Zionist enemy" in a statement carried by Tasnim news agency.

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Macron Rules Out French Hormuz Operations Until Hostilities End

French President Emmanuel Macron stated France will not participate in Strait of Hormuz operations during current hostilities. Any future French escort mission would require an end to fighting, Iranian coordination, and separation from ongoing conflicts. France remains willing to work on convoy protection once conditions stabilize.

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Iran Declares Permanent Change to Strait of Hormuz Operations

Iranian Parliament Speaker Qalibaf announced the Strait of Hormuz will not return to its pre-war status, signaling a potential lasting shift in control of the critical oil shipping route.

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Technology Events

Nvidia Unveils NemoClaw Platform and $1 Trillion Revenue Opportunity at GTC 2026

Nvidia introduced its NemoClaw stack at the GTC 2026 conference, a platform powering the OpenClaw AI agent ecosystem for autonomous personal AI systems. CEO Jensen Huang outlined a $1 trillion revenue opportunity for Blackwell and Rubin chips through 2027, with inference emerging as the dominant demand driver. Analysts noted an estimated $8 to $10 multiplier effect for every dollar spent on Nvidia chips. The announcement signals Nvidia's expansion beyond hardware into software platforms. Meanwhile, CrowdStrike partnered with Nebius to integrate its Falcon security platform into AI cloud infrastructure powered by Nvidia chips, following Nebius's $2 billion funding from Nvidia and a multi-billion Microsoft deal. Analysts maintained bullish outlooks, with Truist holding a $283 price target.

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Amazon CEO Projects AI to Double AWS Revenue to $600B by 2036

Amazon CEO Andy Jassy told employees in an internal meeting that artificial intelligence could drive AWS sales to $600 billion by 2036, doubling the company's previous internal forecast of $300 billion.

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OpenAI Partners with Amazon Web Services to Supply AI Tools to US Government

OpenAI has signed a deal with Amazon Web Services to sell artificial intelligence services to US government agencies and federal workers, according to the Information.

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Microsoft Unifies Copilot AI Teams Under Reorganization

Microsoft is restructuring its Copilot AI product teams to merge commercial and consumer versions, streamlining leadership and consolidating its artificial intelligence efforts for greater coherence across workplace and personal applications.

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Nvidia Restarts China AI Chip Production as CEO Calls US Manufacturing Shift Difficult

Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang announced the company is restarting manufacturing of H200 AI accelerators for China while calling a proposed 40% shift of Taiwan chip production to the US very difficult. Huang forecasts $1 trillion in orders as Nvidia works to reenter the critical Chinese market.

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AMD and Nvidia Lead AI Infrastructure Expansion as Industry Bets Intensify

Agentic AI developments are strengthening AMD's investment case while Nvidia expands its AI push with OpenClaw integration. CEO Huang projects massive AI chip sales growth. Amazon advances AI infrastructure strategy as Keysight debuts new AI inference validation platform. Nvidia faces sell-off following GTC conference despite positive outlook.

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Enterprise AI Adoption Accelerates Amid Bubble Warnings and Job Loss Concerns

Alibaba launched Wukong AI platform to automate office tasks while Capital One and Workday rolled out enterprise AI tools. SoundHound AI partnered with Experis for deployment. Benchmark's Gurley warned of potential AI bubble and correction. Investors face concerns over widespread job displacement from automation wave.

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Trustpilot Profit Quadruples on AI-Driven Growth

Review platform Trustpilot reported profit quadrupling, beating forecasts and raising guidance as AI search integration drives e-commerce deals and margin expansion.

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Alibaba Launches Wukong AI Platform as China's Enterprise Agent Adoption Accelerates

Alibaba unveiled its Wukong agentic AI platform for businesses, planning integrations with Slack and Teams, as Barclays reports surging enterprise AI adoption across China. Benchmark's Gurley cautioned the AI boom risks bubble territory.

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Nvidia Restarts H200 AI Chip Production for China Market

Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang announced the company is resuming manufacturing of H200 AI accelerators for Chinese customers, marking progress in the chipmaker's efforts to reenter the critical Chinese market after previous restrictions.

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Oil And Gas Events

Oil Surges Past $102 as Iran Blockades Hormuz Strait, Threatening Global Supply

Oil prices have climbed above $102 per barrel following Iran's closure of the Strait of Hormuz on March 4, disrupting a route that carries approximately 20% of global oil supplies. Brent crude has surged over 30% since the blockade began, with U.S. gas prices rising 27% amid the escalating conflict. Iran has intensified attacks on Saudi Arabia and UAE energy infrastructure, while Gulf producers scramble to establish alternative shipping routes. Asian refiners are increasingly sourcing crude from outside the Middle East as Hormuz shipping remains largely halted. U.S. allies have shown reluctance to escort tankers through the strait, with France explicitly declining to join reopening efforts. The sustained oil price elevation has raised recession concerns among economists, while the European Central Bank faces mounting pressure for potential rate hikes in response to the oil shock.

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US Diesel Hits $5 Per Gallon as Middle East Conflict Disrupts Global Energy Markets

War in the Middle East has pushed US diesel prices above $5 per gallon while making regional oil the world's most expensive. European markets face volatility amid supply chain disruptions, with analysts warning of increased corporate financial distress from surging energy costs.

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Iran Attacks on UAE Energy Sites Disrupt Gulf Oil Supply, Close Strait of Hormuz

Iranian strikes have set ablaze a UAE gas field and hit a tanker near the Strait of Hormuz, effectively closing the critical waterway. The attacks on energy infrastructure across the region have disrupted Persian Gulf oil and gas supply, pushing crude prices up over 1%.

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Iraq Negotiates with Iran for Oil Tanker Access Through Strait of Hormuz

Iraq's oil minister confirmed the country is coordinating with Iran to secure passage for select oil tankers through the Strait of Hormuz. Iraq views pipeline flows as a strategic buffer against potential disruptions at the critical shipping chokepoint.

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Iraq and Kurdistan Reach Agreement to Resume Oil Exports Through Turkey's Ceyhan Port

Iraq's federal government and Kurdish authorities have agreed to resume oil exports to Turkey's Ceyhan port beginning Wednesday. Kurdish Prime Minister Barzani confirmed Kurdistan will restart exports through the regional pipeline at the earliest opportunity, while ongoing talks with Baghdad aim to establish a secure environment for oil and gas companies to resume production operations.

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Central Europe Mobilizes Oil Reserves and Pipeline Solutions Amid Druzhba Disruption

European nations respond to Druzhba pipeline disruption with coordinated reserve releases and infrastructure deals. Spain commits 11.5 million barrels over 90 days while Germany pledges state reserves. Hungary and Slovakia sign agreement connecting MOL refineries. Ukraine accepts EU mission to restore flows and explore alternative transit routes for non-Russian crude.

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Oil Rises 2.9% Despite Surprise Inventory Build

U.S. crude futures settled at $96.21 per barrel, up $2.71, as supply concerns outweighed API data showing crude stockpiles unexpectedly increased by 6.556 million barrels versus forecasts for a 600,000-barrel decline.

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Transportation Costs Rise as Fuel Prices Impact Supply Chains

Analysts warn diesel fuel price increases will affect retail delivery costs at major chains like Walmart. Brent oil futures face technical analysis scrutiny as energy markets remain volatile amid global supply concerns.

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Fixed Income And Interest Rates Events

Treasury Executes Record $15B Debt Buyback as Credit Markets Show Strain

The U.S. Treasury completed its largest debt buyback in history, purchasing $15 billion of its own securities from $33.5 billion in offers, targeting coupons maturing between 2026 and 2028. The unprecedented move comes as credit markets display signs of stress across multiple sectors. Business development companies face mounting pressure as investors demand higher risk premiums amid anxiety over private credit exposure, with Barclays characterizing soaring BDC risk premiums as justified.

South African Bonds Face Outflows as Iran Conflict Roils Emerging Markets

Iran war tensions trigger bond outflows from South Africa and Pakistan, with Pakistani dollar bonds heading for their steepest monthly decline in three years. Surging oil prices and geopolitical uncertainty weigh on emerging market assets as investors await Federal Reserve decision.

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House Oversight Committee Subpoenas AG Bondi Over Epstein Investigation

The House Oversight Committee has subpoenaed Attorney General Pam Bondi to testify April 14 regarding the Justice Department's handling of the Jeffrey Epstein sex trafficking investigation and related file releases.

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Treasury's $13 Billion 20-Year Bond Auction Shows Strong Demand with Improved Bid Coverage

The Treasury's 20-year bond auction yielded 4.817%, stopping through the when-issued rate by 0.7 basis points. The bid-to-cover ratio improved to 2.76 from 2.36 previously, indicating above-average demand. Indirect bidders took 69.2%, up significantly from 55.2% prior.

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Stock Markets Events

Energy Sector Stocks Surge to 52-Week Highs on Analyst Upgrades

Multiple energy companies reached new 52-week peaks, with Diamondback Energy hitting $186.66 and ConocoPhillips reaching $122.68 following analyst upgrades. Other sector gainers included APA at $35.73, RPC Inc. at $6.85, and USA Compression Partners at $28.18, signaling broad strength across oil and gas equities.

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Indian Markets Surge for Second Day as Sensex Jumps 568 Points, Nifty Approaches 23,600

Indian equities extended their rally for a second consecutive session, with the Sensex gaining 568 points and climbing 1,500 points over two days. The Nifty 50 surged past 23,550, approaching the 23,600 mark amid broad-based buying. Individual stocks showed strong performance, with Eternal rallying 6 percent and Tata Steel rising 4 percent, reflecting continued bullish momentum in the market.

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Earnings Events

Lululemon Beats Q4 Estimates But Weak Outlook Sends Stock Lower

Lululemon reported fourth quarter revenue of $3.6 billion, up 1% year-over-year, beating analyst estimates on earnings per share of $5.01. China mainland sales surged 24% to $528 million, while Americas revenue declined 4% to $2.7 billion. Gross margin compressed 550 basis points to 54.9%. Despite the earnings beat, shares fell as the company issued annual revenue and profit guidance below Wall Street expectations, highlighting ongoing challenges in its core North American market and adding pressure amid broader company transformation efforts.

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DocuSign Shares Rise on Strong Q4 Beat and Raised Guidance

DocuSign reported fourth-quarter adjusted earnings of $1.01 per share on revenue of $837 million, surpassing estimates of $0.95 and $828 million respectively. Revenue grew 8% year-over-year while billings increased 10% to $1.02 billion. The company guided first-quarter revenue of $822-826 million and full-year fiscal 2027 revenue of $3.484-3.496 billion, above consensus expectations. Annual recurring revenue reached $3.272 billion, up 8%, with international revenue climbing 15% to $253 million.

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Healthcare Events

Pfizer's Breast Cancer Drug Shows Promise While Rhythm Pharma Faces Setback in Obesity Trial

Pfizer announced positive Phase 2 results for atirmociclib, its next-generation CDK4 inhibitor, demonstrating a 40% reduction in cancer progression risk for second-line metastatic breast cancer patients. The experimental drug met its primary endpoint in the FOURLIGHT-1 trial. In contrast, Rhythm Pharmaceuticals reported disappointing results from a late-stage trial of its lead asset for rare obesity disorders, sending shares lower. ImmunityBio's ANKTIVA received inclusion in updated NCCN Clinical Practice Guidelines for Bladder Cancer. Esperion will present new analyses from its CLEAR Outcomes trial at the American College of Cardiology's 2026 session. Additional developments include Priavoid's Phase 2 data showing a favorable safety profile for Alzheimer's candidate PRI-002, AtaiBeckley's published Phase 2a depression treatment data, and Anavex Life Sciences' presentation on blarcamesine's effects in Parkinson's disease models. Neuronetics appointed Dan Reuvers as President and CEO, effective March 23.

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Legal Events

SEC and CFTC Issue Joint Guidance Declaring Most Crypto Assets Not Securities

The SEC and CFTC released landmark joint guidance clarifying that most crypto assets fall outside securities laws, ending over a decade of regulatory uncertainty. The framework specifically excludes staking, airdrops, Bitcoin mining, and wrapped tokens from securities classification. This represents the SEC's first formal definitions for crypto asset categorization, establishing a clearer token taxonomy and regulatory boundaries for the digital asset industry in the United States.

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Musk and SEC Negotiate Settlement Over Twitter Stake Disclosure Lawsuit

Elon Musk and the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission are in settlement talks regarding a civil lawsuit over Musk's delayed disclosure of his Twitter stake, according to court filings.

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Real Estate Events

US Pending Home Sales Rise 1.8% in February on Lower Mortgage Rates Despite Hovering Near Record Lows

US pending home sales unexpectedly rebounded 1.8% month-over-month in February, beating economist estimates of a 0.6% decline, as buyers responded to falling mortgage rates and slower price growth. The index reached 72.1, up from 70.8 in January, marking the first increase in three months. However, sales remain down 0.6% year-over-year and continue hovering near historic lows. The modest recovery follows mortgage rate declines during the month, though the housing market remains weak overall. Canadian home sales also fell in February, though industry groups remain optimistic about spring market activity.

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UK Mortgage Costs Jump £788 Annually Amid Iran Conflict and Market Volatility

British homeowners face sharply higher borrowing costs, with typical new mortgages rising £788 annually over two weeks amid geopolitical tensions following Iran conflict escalation. The spike, attributed to "Trumpflation" concerns, pushes rates to three-month highs at a critical period for housing markets. Meanwhile, Canadian borrowers with strong credit increasingly default on payments, and US housing inventory shows highest January relisting activity since 2016, potentially creating buyer opportunities despite elevated rates near 6.2 percent.

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REITs See Active Trading as Mortgage Rates Climb to 3-Month Highs

Institutional investors made notable moves in real estate securities, with Jain Global investing $7.27 million in First Industrial Realty Trust and acquiring new positions in Zillow Group. Multiple ETFs declared quarterly distributions, including iShares U.S. Digital Infrastructure at $0.1841 and iShares Cohen & Steers REIT at $0.1887. Meanwhile, mortgage and refinance rates rose to three-month highs on March 17, 2026, potentially impacting housing market dynamics as investors debate residential real estate strategies.

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Corporate Actions Events

Qualcomm Announces $20 Billion Buyback and Dividend Increase

Qualcomm, the leading smartphone processor manufacturer, approved a $20 billion share repurchase program and raised its quarterly dividend, sending shares higher on the news.

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Nebius Group Targets $3.75 Billion Convertible Debt Raise Following Meta Partnership

AI data center developer Nebius Group announced plans to raise $3.75 billion through convertible senior notes following a major commercial agreement with Meta Platforms and Nvidia deals.

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Currencies Events

Australian Dollar Volatile After RBA Rate Hike Amid Mixed Market Reaction

The Reserve Bank of Australia raised interest rates citing building inflation pressures, but the Australian dollar weakened against major currencies as markets interpreted the move as dovish, with AUD/USD experiencing sharp swings following Governor Bullock's commentary.

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Other Events

TSA Crisis Deepens as Officers Quit, Threatening Airport Closures

Government shutdown forces TSA staffing crisis as 366 officers quit in past month. Houston Hobby saw 55% Saturday callouts, highest single-airport rate since funding lapse began. Delta reports extended checkpoint wait times nationwide. Trump administration warns smaller airports may close if funding standoff continues.

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[3 YOE, Fresh Grad, Backend & AI SWE, United States] Graduating with Masters this Spring and struggling with job search

https://i.redd.it/atfyhrvv8opg1.jpeg

Monday, March 16, 2026

The Daily Market Flux - Your Complete Market Rundown (03/16/2026)

Our platform aggregates and organizes all relevant market news, helping you stay informed, up-to-date, and knowledgeable without spending hours sifting through headlines.

Reinvented to keep you in control, it's where your edge begins with better information. Go from market noise to clarity in seconds with a real-time platform built to redefine how traders and investors digest financial news.

Visit www.marketflux.io

Here is Your Complete Market Rundown (03/16/2026)

Geopolitics Events

U.S. and China Hold Productive Trade Talks in Paris, Discuss Tariff Stability and New Regime

U.S. and Chinese officials concluded three-hour trade discussions in Paris on Monday, with both sides characterizing the meetings positively. Treasury Secretary Bessent described the talks as "very good" and aimed at preventing retaliation, while Chinese negotiator Li said discussions were "in-depth and candid." The parties agreed to maintain stability in tariff levels and discussed bilateral tariffs, possible extensions of tariff suspensions, and the new U.S. tariff regime. Separately, Bessent indicated any oil price interventions would depend on war duration in Iran, while treasury yields declined as investors monitored oil markets ahead of the Federal Reserve's interest rate decision.

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Trump Reports Extensive Military Campaign Against Iran, 7,000 Targets Struck

President Trump announced U.S. forces have struck over 7,000 targets across Iran in recent days, destroying more than 30 mine-laying vessels in the Strait of Hormuz. The campaign has decimated Iran's anti-aircraft equipment and achieved a 95% reduction in drone attacks, according to Trump. He stated Kharg Island has been largely destroyed except for oil pipeline infrastructure, which remains intact. Trump claimed Iran has few missiles remaining and expects minimal retaliatory capability. Despite calling on international partners to help secure the Strait of Hormuz, no countries have made firm commitments to deploy naval forces. Trump said some nations prefer not to get involved in the conflict.

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Trump Says Iran Wants Deal But Leadership Uncertainty Clouds Negotiations

President Trump stated Iran wants to make a deal and is talking to U.S. officials, though he emphasized uncertainty about whether they're ready to negotiate. Trump acknowledged not knowing Iran's current leaders, including whether the Supreme Leader is alive, complicating diplomatic efforts.

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White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles Diagnosed with Early Stage Breast Cancer

President Trump announced that White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles has been diagnosed with early stage breast cancer and will begin treatment immediately. Trump praised Wiles as "an incredible Chief of Staff" and "one of the strongest people I know." She plans to continue her duties during treatment.

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Trump Calls for Emergency Fed Rate Cut, Says Timing Is Obvious

President Trump urged the Federal Reserve to convene a special meeting and cut interest rates immediately, arguing the current moment presents an ideal opportunity for monetary easing that even a third-grader could recognize.

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Bessent Dismisses Iran Concerns as Factor in Potential Trump China Visit Delay

Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent clarified that any postponement of President Trump's late-March China visit would stem from Trump's preference to monitor developments from Washington, not from Chinese requests related to the Iran conflict or Strait of Hormuz situation. Bessent downplayed concerns about diplomatic implications from a potential delay.

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Trump Schedules White House Press Conference Before Kennedy Center Board Meeting

President Trump will hold a news conference at the White House on Monday at 10:45 a.m. EST, preceding his 11:45 a.m. closed-door meeting with the John F. Kennedy Center board of trustees.

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Trump Postpones Xi Summit Amid Iran Conflict

President Trump requested a month-long delay of his planned China trip to focus on Iran tensions, claiming his military actions against Iran prevented World War 3.

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Over 200 US Troops Injured in Iran Conflict Across Seven Countries

Approximately 200 US service members have been wounded in the ongoing war with Iran across seven countries including Bahrain and Iraq. The vast majority sustained minor injuries, with over 180 already returned to duty. Ten troops are considered seriously wounded, according to US Central Command.

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US Industrial Production Climbs 0.2% in February, Beating Expectations

US industrial production rose 0.2% in February, exceeding the 0.1% forecast, marking the fourth consecutive monthly gain driven by increased factory and mining output.

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Supreme Court to Hear Trump Administration's Bid to End Migrant Protections

The Supreme Court will hear arguments on the Trump administration's efforts to terminate temporary legal protections for Haitian and Syrian migrants. Separately, an appeals court has authorized expedited deportations of migrants to third countries.

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Trump Administration Challenges Court Ruling Blocking Powell Subpoenas

The Justice Department asked Judge Boasberg to reconsider his ruling that quashed subpoenas for Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell, arguing an incorrect legal standard was applied in blocking the summons.

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Germany's Merz Rules Out Military Involvement in Iran Conflict

German Chancellor Merz stated Germany will not participate in any Iran war or Strait of Hormuz security operations, emphasizing the conflict must end quickly with a clear strategy.

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Iran and US Hold Direct Talks in Recent Days

Iran and the United States have engaged in direct contact over recent days, according to sources cited by Axios, marking a notable diplomatic development between the two nations.

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Trump Warns U.S. Could Strike Iran's Kharg Island Oil Facilities

President Trump stated the U.S. could destroy oil infrastructure on Iran's Kharg Island, the country's main crude export hub, at a moment's notice. While recent U.S. strikes targeted military installations on the island, energy facilities were deliberately spared but remain potential targets.

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Trump Says He Expects to Take Cuba

President Trump stated he believes he will have the honor of taking Cuba, suggesting he could either free or take control of the island nation while claiming he could do anything with it.

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Technology Events

Nvidia Projects $1 Trillion Revenue Through 2027 as CEO Unveils Expanded AI Chip Roadmap at GTC Conference

Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang announced at the company's GTC 2026 conference that the chipmaker expects at least $1 trillion in revenue from its Blackwell and Rubin AI chips through the end of 2027, doubling the previous year's $500 billion outlook. Huang stated that 60 percent of this demand will come from hyperscalers and cloud AI providers, with computing demand expected to exceed even these projections. The announcement came as Nvidia unveiled a sweeping array of new products and partnerships aimed at maintaining its dominance in AI infrastructure. Key launches included the Vera CPU targeting agentic AI workloads, the Dynamo 1.0 software platform for AI inference at scale, and the NemoClaw enterprise AI agent framework with built-in security controls. The company also introduced the Groq 3 AI chip and expanded its open AI model portfolio for agents, robotics, and healthcare applications. Nvidia demonstrated its push into new markets with the Vera Rubin Space-1 chip system for orbital AI data centers, delivering up to 25 times more AI compute than the H100 for space-based inferencing. The company also launched its Physical AI Data Factory Blueprint to accelerate development in robotics, vision AI, and autonomous vehicles. Major technology partners announced expanded collaborations at the conference. Dell launched AI workstations with Nvidia GB300 chip support, while HPE expanded its AI portfolio with Blackwell and Rubin systems. IBM, CrowdStrike, Cisco, and Adobe all unveiled deeper integrations with Nvidia technology. In robotics, Skild AI partnered with ABB Robotics, Universal Robots, and Nvidia to deploy AI systems in production environments, including high-precision assembly of Blackwell systems with Foxconn. The announcements come as investors scrutinize whether Nvidia can justify its valuation amid questions about potential slowdowns in AI spending. Hyperscalers are projected to spend nearly $700 billion on AI infrastructure in 2026, though this represents a fraction of the estimated $1 trillion S&P 500 companies are allocating to other growth initiatives.

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Meta Signs $27 Billion AI Infrastructure Deal with Nebius Over Five Years

Meta has agreed to purchase up to $27 billion in AI infrastructure from Nebius through 2030, including $12 billion in dedicated capacity beginning early 2027 and an additional $15 billion commitment for compute resources across Nebius clusters.

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Nvidia Unveils Vera Rubin Platform with Seven New Chips for Agentic AI

Nvidia launched Vera Rubin, a rack-scale AI system featuring seven chips including the new Vera CPU. The platform delivers 3.6 exaflops of compute and 260 TB/s NVLink bandwidth across five racks, targeting agentic AI applications with liquid-cooled architecture.

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OpenAI Pursues $10 Billion Joint Venture with Major Private Equity Firms

OpenAI is in advanced talks with TPG, Bain Capital, Advent, and Brookfield to establish a joint venture focused on distributing AI products to portfolio companies. The private equity firms are considering committing $4 billion for equity stakes in the venture, which would be valued at $10 billion. The partnership aims to accelerate enterprise adoption of OpenAI's artificial intelligence software across the firms' extensive business portfolios.

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BCE Partners with CoreWeave and Cerebras for $1.7 Billion Saskatchewan AI Data Center

Canada's BCE will invest $1.7 billion in Saskatchewan to build the country's largest purpose-built AI data center, partnering with CoreWeave and Cerebras in a 300 MW facility expanding Bell AI Fabric's national network.

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Nvidia CEO Huang Doubles Revenue Target to $1 Trillion Through 2027

Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang announced the company now sees at least $1 trillion in AI infrastructure demand through 2027, doubling last year's $500 billion projection. Hyperscalers and cloud AI providers represent 60% of expected demand for the chipmaker's latest AI products.

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Crypto Events

Strategy Purchases $1.6 Billion in Bitcoin as Price Surges Past $74,000

Michael Saylor's Strategy executed its largest bitcoin acquisition of 2026, purchasing 22,337 BTC for approximately $1.6 billion last week using preferred shares. The purchase brings the company's total holdings to 761,068 bitcoin, marking its 12th consecutive weekly buy. Strategy's stock has rallied 35% from its February low, outpacing bitcoin's own gains during the period. Bitcoin reclaimed the $74,000 level amid renewed institutional demand, with cryptocurrency ETFs recording $793 million in inflows driven primarily by BlackRock. The digital asset has climbed nearly 25% from its February bottom, approaching the $75,000 threshold as market sentiment shifts from extreme fear to neutral territory. Japanese firm Metaplanet announced a substantial capital raise between $255 million and $531 million to accelerate its bitcoin accumulation strategy, sending its stock up 5% on Monday. The move reflects growing corporate treasury adoption of bitcoin as a reserve asset. Bitcoin's recent strength comes as geopolitical tensions in the Middle East show signs of cooling after three weeks of U.S.-Iran conflict. The cryptocurrency has demonstrated resilience by decoupling from traditional equity markets, with some analysts highlighting its performance relative to gold during the volatile period. Analysts are now watching key technical levels, with some projecting potential moves toward $80,000, though others urge caution at current valuations.

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Bitcoin Nears $74,000 Amid Mixed Signals Before FOMC Meeting

Bitcoin touched $74,000 as spot demand increased and bull flag patterns broke, though analysts caution against excessive optimism at $73,000 levels. Ethereum outperformed Bitcoin while fear and greed indicators showed conflicting sentiment ahead of tomorrow's Federal Reserve decision.

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Bitmine Acquires 60,999 ETH in Single Week, Pushing Total Holdings Above 4.6 Million Tokens

Bitmine Immersion Technologies purchased 60,999 Ethereum tokens in one week, bringing total holdings to over 4.59 million ETH valued above $10 billion. The acquisition drove BMNR stock up 8-9% amid broader Ethereum strength.

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XRP Surges Past $90 Billion Market Cap on Institutional Demand and Technical Breakout

XRP rallied sharply driven by institutional crypto demand ahead of the Fed decision, strong ETF inflows, and a technical breakout above key resistance levels. The broader cryptocurrency market recovered with Ethereum also surging as bulls regained control.

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Oil And Gas Events

US Permits Iranian Oil Tankers Through Strait of Hormuz to Maintain Global Supply

Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent announced Monday that the US is allowing Iranian oil tankers to pass through the Strait of Hormuz to help maintain global supply. Bessent stated the US is "fine with" the natural opening Iran is providing, despite reduced tanker traffic following Iranian attacks in the region.

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Oil Volatility Continues as WTI Swings Between $99 and $94 Amid Iran Conflict and Bessent Comments

Oil markets experienced sharp intraday swings as WTI crude fell 4% below $95 after Treasury Secretary Bessent predicted prices "much lower" than $80 within months. Despite the selloff from above $100, traders maintain bets on WTI returning to triple digits by week's end as Iran conflict enters third week. RBOB gasoline futures held steady at $3.03, showing divergence from crude's volatility.

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Drone Attack Ignites Fire at Abu Dhabi Shah Oil and Gas Field

A drone strike caused a fire at Abu Dhabi's Shah oil and gas field, prompting an emergency response from authorities. No injuries were reported in the attack on the UAE facility. The incident forced Dubai International Airport to divert flights while crews worked to contain the blaze. Gulf nations have disputed Iran's assertions that it is not targeting civilian infrastructure, though no attribution for this specific attack was provided in initial reports.

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European Markets Eye Gains as Oil Volatility Dominates Global Trading

European markets are positioned to open higher Monday despite persistent volatility in energy markets. Crude oil prices remain elevated above $100 per barrel amid escalating US-Iran tensions and supply disruption fears in the Strait of Hormuz. Dubai physical crude has surged near $150, trading at a $40-50 premium over paper contracts. Natural gas prices are rising on supply concerns, while edible oil costs have increased by ₹11-20 per kilogram in March. Oil marketing companies have fallen up to 5.5 percent on the elevated crude environment. JPMorgan recommends buying the dip despite war fears unsettling markets.

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Gas Prices Could Reach $4 Per Gallon Amid Global Energy Supply Concerns

U.S. gasoline prices may hit $4 per gallon as global oil markets face pressure, according to GasBuddy analysts. European natural gas prices are projected 40% higher through 2027 due to Iran conflict and potential Strait of Hormuz closure creating supply shortfalls, HSBC reports.

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Macro Events

Canadian Inflation Cools to 1.8% in February, Below Forecast

Canada's annual inflation rate decelerated to 1.8% in February from previous levels, slightly below the estimated 1.9%, Statistics Canada reported. Monthly inflation rose 0.5%, missing the 0.7% forecast. Core CPI trim increased 2.3% year-over-year, with the decline attributed to base year effects.

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Supreme Court to Hear Trump Administration's Bid to End Migrant Protections

The Supreme Court will hear arguments on the Trump administration's efforts to terminate temporary legal protections for Haitian and Syrian migrants. Separately, an appeals court has authorized expedited deportations of migrants to third countries.

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Powell to Remain on Fed Board Through DOJ Investigation

Court papers from US Attorney Jeanine Pirro's Federal Reserve investigation reveal Chair Jerome Powell intends to stay on the Board of Governors until the legal probe concludes. While Powell's chair term expires in May, his governor term runs through January 2028, and filings indicate he feels obligated to remain throughout the ongoing investigation.

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Healthcare Events

NRx Pharma Surges on FDA Ketamine Drug Pathway; Structure Therapeutics' GLP-1 Draws Analyst Praise

NRx Pharmaceuticals stock jumped after the FDA outlined a path to New Drug Application approval for its ketamine-based depression treatment. Structure Therapeutics gained attention from multiple analysts, with William Blair reiterating an Outperform rating citing considerable market opportunity for aleniglipron, while Leerink highlighted the company's oral GLP-1 achieving best-in-class weight loss results. Rhythm Pharmaceuticals announced topline results from its Phase 3 EMANATE trial. Aktis Oncology shares rose 7.2%, while one biotech stock surged 75% last quarter, attracting $9 million in new investment. BioNTech emerged as a potential value play given substantial cash reserves. Medical Facilities reached a new 52-week high, contrasting with Medicenna Therapeutics hitting a one-year low.

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Esperion's Bempedoic Acid Gains Top-Tier Guideline Status for Cholesterol Management

Esperion Therapeutics received multiple Class 1 recommendations for bempedoic acid in new ACC/AHA dyslipidemia guidelines. Separately, Eledon achieved insulin independence in islet transplant trials, while competition intensifies for oral GLP-1 diabetes medications.

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Federal Judge Blocks RFK Jr.'s Childhood Vaccine Policy Changes

A federal court halted the Trump administration's attempt to reduce recommended childhood vaccines and invalidated Kennedy's vaccine advisory panel restructuring efforts.

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Structure Therapeutics Weight-Loss Pill Shows Promise Against Novo and Lilly Rivals

Structure Therapeutics shares rose following positive trial data for its experimental oral GLP-1 weight-loss drug, positioning it as a potential competitor to oral treatments from Novo Nordisk and Eli Lilly. Separately, Eledon reported insulin independence results in an islet transplant trial.

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Roche Secures CE Mark for Alzheimer's Blood Test as AstraZeneca Gains EU Cancer Approval

Roche obtained CE marking for its Elecsys ApoE4 blood test detecting Alzheimer's disease risk variants, while AstraZeneca won EU approval for Imfinzi in early gastric cancer treatment.

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Rhythm Pharmaceuticals obesity drug fails late-stage trial despite $7M investment

Rhythm Pharmaceuticals' rare obesity treatment missed primary endpoints in late-stage study, even as company secured $7 million in new funding. Meanwhile, Structure Therapeutics' oral GLP-1 achieved best-in-class weight loss results.

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LifeMD Appoints Atul Kavthekar as Chief Financial Officer

LifeMD has named veteran healthcare finance executive Atul Kavthekar as CFO and announced additional leadership team expansions. Separately, KKM Financial increased its stake in CVS Health.

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Fixed Income And Interest Rates Events

Bond Markets Turn Risk-Averse as Iran Conflict Threatens Inflation Outlook

Bond investors adopted defensive positions ahead of the Federal Reserve meeting as Middle East tensions raised inflation concerns. Canada's inflation eased to 1.8% in February, though analysts warn this represents calm before an energy-driven storm. The dollar retreated from recent highs while the Canadian dollar strengthened against the USD. Bond managers increased bets on central bank policy divergence despite war-related inflation risks supporting higher rates.

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Treasury Yields and Dollar Drop as U.S. Signals Flexibility on Strait of Hormuz Access

Treasury yields fell over 6 basis points and the dollar weakened after the Treasury Secretary indicated willingness to allow select Iranian, Indian, and Chinese vessels through the Strait of Hormuz, easing oil market tensions and sending Brent crude down $3 per barrel.

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High-Yield Investment Vehicles Face Sustainability Questions as Bond Markets Turn Cautious

Business development companies are offering yields between 14% and 27%, with HRZN and SCM among those paying double-digit returns, though sustainability concerns persist. Bond fund managers are increasing divergent rate positions while investors adopt risk-averse strategies ahead of the Federal Reserve meeting, citing geopolitical tensions involving Iran.

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London Stock Exchange Launches Dollar Bond Sale Amid Heavy Investment-Grade Issuance

The London Stock Exchange initiated a US dollar bond sale for debt refinancing, contributing to an anticipated busy day in the investment-grade debt market. Meanwhile, Luxembourg successfully sold 2.5 billion euros in bonds maturing March 2036. Market attention also focused on high-yield opportunities, with business development companies offering yields between 14% and 27%, though sustainability concerns persist.

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Oil Plunges 4% as Treasury Secretary Bessent Predicts Sharp Price Decline

WTI crude fell over 4% Monday, dropping from $99 to below $95 per barrel after Treasury Secretary Bessent predicted oil prices could fall "much lower" than $80 within months. The intraday low reached $94.31, marking a $4 decline. Despite the crude selloff, RBOB gasoline futures remained stable at $3.03. Traders had initially bet on WTI reaching $100 by week's end. Market analysts warn that avoiding a consensus supply surplus in 2026 through demand destruction rather than production adjustments could prove catastrophic for the industry.

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Treasury Yields Fall as Oil Retreats Ahead of Fed Decision

U.S. Treasury yields declined Monday, with the 10-year yield dropping over 6 basis points to 4.22% as oil prices retreated from recent highs, marking the start of a Federal Reserve decision week.

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Earnings Events

Arena Group, Getty Images Miss Earnings Expectations Amid Mixed Quarter

Arena Group reported fourth-quarter EPS of $0.11, missing estimates by $0.02, while revenue of $28.2M fell short by $5.8M, sending shares down 4%. Getty Images swung to a loss with EPS missing by $0.04-$0.05 despite revenue beating expectations at $282.3M, though weak 2026 guidance pressured the stock lower.

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SEC Considers Ending Mandatory Quarterly Earnings Reports

The Securities and Exchange Commission is preparing a proposal to eliminate mandatory quarterly earnings reporting, potentially allowing companies to report financial results only twice annually instead of four times per year.

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Mixed Earnings Day as Semtech and Assertio Beat Estimates While Others Fall Short

Semtech reported fourth quarter adjusted EPS of $0.44, narrowly beating expectations by $0.01 with revenue of $274.4M. Assertio Holdings exceeded estimates with non-GAAP EPS of -$1.06, beating by $0.74, and revenue of $13.52M surpassing forecasts by $7.32M. W&T Offshore and Comtech Telecommunications missed revenue targets.

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Telos Corporation Reports Strong Q4 2025 Results with Revenue Surge and Profitability

Telos Corporation exceeded Q4 2025 earnings forecasts, driving stock gains. The company achieved a 77% revenue increase and reached a profitability milestone, marking significant operational improvement for the quarter.

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OPAL Fuels Stock Surges Despite Q4 Earnings Miss on Strong EBITDA Growth

OPAL Fuels reported fourth quarter 2025 results that missed EPS forecasts but drove shares higher, as EBITDA jumped 51% year-over-year driven by production growth.

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Dollar Tree and Telos Release Fourth Quarter 2025 Earnings Results

Dollar Tree Inc. and Telos Corporation reported their fourth quarter 2025 financial results, with both discount retailer and cybersecurity firm holding earnings calls to discuss quarterly performance with investors and analysts.

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Metals Events

London Metal Exchange Halts All Trading Due to Technical Issue

Trading stopped across all London Metal Exchange contracts, from aluminum to zinc, as the exchange works to resolve an unspecified technical issue. Dealers cannot place orders while awaiting information on the outage's cause.

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Corporate Actions Events

Beyond Meat Delays 2025 Annual Report Filing on Inventory Review

Beyond Meat announced a delay in filing its Form 10-K annual report for the year ended December 31, 2025, citing an ongoing inventory review, sending shares lower in after-hours trading.

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Salesforce Launches Historic $25 Billion Share Buyback Program

Salesforce has initiated a record $25 billion accelerated share repurchase program, its largest buyback ever, driving shares higher as the company focuses on AI growth initiatives.

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UniCredit Launches €35 Billion Takeover Bid for Commerzbank

Italy's UniCredit has made a €35 billion takeover offer for Germany's Commerzbank, seeking to exceed a 30% stake through an exchange offer, likely setting up a prolonged battle for control of the German lender.

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Janus Living Targets $740M in Senior Housing REIT IPO

Healthpeak Properties' Janus Living launches IPO of 37 million shares priced at $18-20, seeking to raise up to $740 million with potential $5 billion valuation for the seniors-focused REIT.

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Kaltura to Acquire PathFactory for $22 Million in Cash

Kaltura has signed a definitive agreement to acquire PathFactory.ai for approximately $22 million in an all-cash transaction, advancing its mission to power agentic digital experiences.

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Stick figure drawing doodles 10LightStar01 is live!

Stick figure drawing doodles 10LightStar01 is live!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hq9CwopUH1s

This is a fever dream of a digital age—a sprawling, surrealist tapestry where crochet patterns meet high-speed police chases, and the Grim Reaper is just another guy trying to manage an office.

Here is the story of The Day the Grid Glitched.

The Morning Shift

The day began in a flurry of #ModernCrochet and chaos. At the local craft guild, a "Magical Crochet Gargoyle Quitter" was throwing in the towel, leaving behind a trail of freeform stars and loose ends. Meanwhile, in the corporate underworld, the Grim Reaper CEO adjusted his tie at his administrative desk. "It’s my panel," he hissed to a room of trembling interns, "and you will respect the filing system."

Outside, the physical world was losing its grip on reality. A green avocado was spotted zip-lining across the forest canopy, screaming "Wee!" while a dairy cow and a buffalo experienced love at first sight on the prairie. It was beautiful, until the "Authorized Official Shambulance" sped by with off-key sirens, driven by a DoorDash driver who had clearly taken a wrong turn at the interstate.

The Midday Madness

By noon, the legal system was buckling. A divorce attorney was arguing for a 4% inflation alimony increase, while a stubborn police officer attempted to ticket a driver for doing 55 mph, despite the driver’s GPS claiming otherwise.

In the skies, things weren't much better. An airplane pilot abandoned the cockpit—not because of an emergency, but to fix a sewer leak in the bathroom. This left the County Sheriff’s helicopter pilot to pick up the slack, shouting the command code "Accel UR L8 twerk" into his AI navigator.

Back on the ground, the "Microwave Preventive Maintenance Team" (composed entirely of trolls in tin foil hats) was conducting a rigorous inspection of a breakroom, while nearby, a police officer and his best friend were formally interrogating a hairball.

The Evening Gala

As the sun set, a tarnished copper green armadillo drone took flight from the roof of a skyscraper, filming the most anticipated event of the year: the wedding of the Grim Reaper and the Reapress. They exchanged vows of "invisible threat control" while a dancing xenophobic xylophone provided the music.

However, the party was crashed by a Giant Plushy Octopus looking for hugs and a "Slip and Fall Droidbot" seeking a lawsuit settlement. In the corner, Holly Bitcoin gave tap dance lessons to a singing pickle, while a group of mushroom soldiers set up tents inside a refrigerator’s cooling system to escape the heat.

The Final Stitch

As the clock struck midnight on March 8, 2026, the digital world began to "URL barf." Google Meet was exposing phone numbers, and the #DreamTrackAI was telling everyone to "try again tomorrow."

The chaos finally settled into a quiet, bizarre peace. A Jack Rabbit and a Skunk shared a moment in the woods, and a single claymation blue bird tucked its family into a nest made of crochet scrap yarn. The world was a mess of unredacted reports, stuck cruise controls, and singing rainbows—but as the Star and Hammer cartoon faded to black, one thing was clear: nobody was above the law, but everyone was definitely above the limit for weirdness.

The scene opens on a high-stakes, high-altitude pursuit. Jack, a lanky cartoon cat with whiskers that twitch like radio antennas, is dangling from a vine. Hammer, a stout mouse wearing a tiny tool belt, is standing on Jack’s head, squinting through a pair of brass binoculars.

"Target sighted," Hammer squeaked, pointing a tiny paw toward the horizon. "And he’s moving fast."

Zip-lining across the triple-canopy rainforest at a reckless velocity was Avocado. He wasn't just a fruit; he was a daredevil with a pit of pure adrenaline. Wearing tiny goggles and a GoPro strapped to his pebbly green skin, Avocado let out a high-pitched, "WEEEEEEEE!" as he blurred past a troop of confused howler monkeys.

The Chase is On

Jack didn't have a zip-line, but he did have cartoon physics. He grabbed a passing toucan by the feet, and with a rhythmic "Bang! Bang!" of Hammer’s literal mallet against a hollow log to create a beat, they swung into the sky.

"We need to intercept him before he hits the Cloud Forest!" Hammer shouted over the wind. "If he zips into the 'Modern Crochet' sector, we'll lose him in the yarn fog!"

The Obstacles:

  • The Sourdough Rapids: A river of fermented dough they had to skip across.
  • The Giant Plushy Octopus: A sentient obstacle that tried to hug them mid-air.
  • The Interior Microwave Team: A group of trolls in tin foil hats who were trying to "inspect" the jungle for grease fires.

The Final Stretch

Avocado was gaining speed, his pit humming like a drone motor. He was headed straight for a transitional train scene—a steam engine locomotive puffing purple smoke across a trestle bridge.

"Now, Jack! Use the yarn smudging technique!" Hammer commanded.

Jack pulled a scrap of neon-pink crochet string from his pocket. With the grace of a Vaudeville performer defying gravity, he whipped the string forward. It looped around Avocado’s stem just as the fruit was about to clear the canopy.

ZIP—THWIP—BOING!

The tension on the crochet line acted like a bungee cord. Avocado didn't crash; he performed a perfect, mid-air 360-degree flip, his tiny goggles fogging up with joy.

The Landing

They all tumbled onto a soft mossy log near a Box Turtle who was busy falling in love with an Armadillo. Avocado bounced twice, his GoPro still recording the whole "Brainrot" investigation.

"Why were you running?" Jack panted, his fur standing up in static-electrified tufts.

Avocado adjusted his goggles and looked at them with wide, watery eyes. "Running? I wasn't running. I was just trying to get to the Holly Bitcoin Tap Dance Lessons before the early bird special ended."

Hammer looked at Jack. Jack looked at the Armadillo.

"Well," Hammer sighed, putting his mallet back in his belt. "At least we got the footage. This is going to kill on #DreamTrackAI."

VLq-x3ou19E untitled
0TMbRWk4WjI The making of Jack and Hammer, cartoon cat and mouse, bang
27LTuniln4k untitled
r384VZLXu3A It's go time with Grandma and hot grits in the ring
Ttbtm4D_gWo pole vault remix
hxicWioIX38 How to take the loose end of crochet stitch, put it over the main strand, fold loop
_Tn8GDwQxAU Police officer can't stop car due to cruise control being stuck #crazycars #carwars
HIXe_nKGXwA Untitled Help I can't put my foot in a shoe without a hole in the shoe
SbURuV-AfKw Untitled Magical crochet gargoyle quitter I Quit doodle art animation
wXRoZkjgg1Y pingrok Being hold off in an ambulance
Ws8yubqGV9k Join the National Guard.
Y42d9L-TPl4 Untitled You U Ewe and I, eye aye have gone on a date a couple of times haven't we?
UK9nCeVtutU Untitled door dash ambulance Authorized official shambulance services
s0zhJiIvVI4 How to skip one crochet, stitch and count to 3 #moderncrochet #beginners
6rfXhtSP5xk Cuddlefish jellyfish love at first sight in the ocean, prairie of plankton.
LGU4J83SAxs Green avocado goes zip lining A top the forest canopy Wee
arAPCXGIWCs Untitled Hapoy Jake Patrick Wesley Day
jS4zJkPKeY8 Untitled I love ❤️ you Singing pickle
qzs14JC3VUY Holly Bitcoin Tap Dance Lessons
PzLApGgcrDw Unlisted cat Video Bob chicken Crane
ZSNHIl-H_YA Trolls in tin foil hats Following.\n The microwave team That looks like fun
cK5lfQtYRL0 Ma.\n King a crochet larger one, 2, 3, Stitching.\n A square. Basic beginner, crafting.
iao2E0zcS0Y The life of bug, Mushroom soldiers set up tents inside of refrigerator cooling system #theoutcasts
jsnY8MNuZ34 Best cooling system on the planet fixed by maintenance refrigerator repair #applianceexperts
_UGblsuJUnw My artificial intelligence tool on YouTube is really popular, it's telling me to try again tomorrow.
5VYC607cWVw #DreamTrackAI pretty little baby, wiggle loves give me
WWB1d8vomoI Gorilla vs Laughing cactus toy
8kKjbmBxytA Hippopotamus manatee love at first sight
UuRPSEgUONw Untitled Sunshine smiles, fluffy ponies Singing rainbow
MuaLc-TsHb8 unlisted can't touch this
Oh1h3EYHT6w The interior microwave, preventive maintenance checks and services team Inspections
qytG5WJmjH0 Me police officer and best friend interrogate a hairball #brainrot very bizarre investigation
aqgdVA9zh90 Jack McAuley Doggy Day Care
1hJy1EeMquw Unlisted Unclassified
zMfSaHTThaE How To freeform crochet flower 🌼 #doodle
dKb1qRc3o9o yeti best friend and cactus doing winter dance ballet in snow
hKynH3bUS1s Dairy cow and Buffalo love at first sight on the prairie
CxNKsmayhGY Crochet string scrap 🪹 nest for baby birds
nDzxUT-XaqY Untitled Steam Engine LocomotiveTrain transitional scene
GQGUaP3GCH8 Geminisyria Cooking Pizza in outdoor Stone fire pit with Trollba
Avz8V3n_GMg The airplane pilot has left the cockpit and is fixing a sewer leak in the bathroom. #squawkbox
tpOQC0ZO2Qs The making of cartoon Jack and Doodle Fire Rescue Airplane
J2QnlZxfPDE Unlisted
zO11ZBlTuk0 untitled cat reflections
vxy39kHdeYo Grim Reaper CEO It's my panel and you will respect me, Administrative desk job clerk opening
82j_JU_L2Hg When space force attends a retirement party for National Guard, Major Foughcup
Q3gfpuOd1tU I've tried to like people. I really have, and then they start talking and breathing And stuff
dA7Hm9ZCG3Q Divorce attorney Request 4% inflation alimony from divorce judge For ex, wife, survival
W20EkPyA8h4 Untitled pointing to the sky pose
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EMsniptQwao Out of control ambulance in the middle of the interstate Off key sirens #emsweek
O2CdiQDAgOw Me running through under water transpatent cables in the ocean with emoji balls
m_UBIWxyKjc Gerbils and mice scratching a record
kzE4Z4gWIgQ Untitled working with grown men in the corn 🌽
tpWdK6sqUd0 Grim reaper and best friend crash a stadium concert giving tourists a tour Through the arena.
DrMa2hwb6Ts Untitled Below river window displays local attraction
Q02wFzUWqq4 The Curiosity Hook: The making of Jack Star and Hammer Cartoon
ICFUxXR_hBA Jack Rabbit Skunk Love in the woods
9KZe4RnXfOA Armadillo box turtle love near fern moss log deep in the forest.
FqthJO69_oA County Sheriff helicopter pilot gives command code to GPS AI- "Accel UR L8 twerk" #quadcopters
BL6RojCX47Q She didnt just dance, she defied gravity, vaudeville big band era
lrhNN8WfdVY Tarnished copper green armadillo drone takes flight
Nop7msLpFbo Ice Police arrest Oticfyptokmiss Rodriguez during building ladder escape
VfgRh7Ihu_8 Police arrest trollGPTchat
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ceU9T6Y--C8 Slip and Fall Droidbot Doggabuls Synergy Drink TransOracle Lipplate lawsuite Zoroke partner
NstJxUjDXOg Untitled unitard, yoga tree pose
Zx6BBFXOXmE My GPS says I was doing 55 miles an hour, Stubborn Hard-headed police officer Traffic stop
oopFOTBwRKA How to use yarn as a blending tool for smudging, Transitioning Pencil pen drawings. Art Sketch Tip
FkjnyVeY-Mk Unlisted Partial Unredacted Committee on Judiciary Jack Smith Report
i_naFvEeaP8 The vacuum hose vent safety cleaning drone To reach high places inside the home Prevent slip fall
8EepbpHH5gs Google's clients are having a URL barf 403 error #remotejobs #sidehustle
9OxrKTj2p-Y March 8, 2026
hqyDrKMckmA CPU central processing unit green energy HVAC BOILER room cleaning maintenance
iS6iZjXv8Ok The claymation cartoon story of spaghetti and noodle, the Blue Bird family Nest
7zT96UKY9yY Surrender Burart
S-fYKAxS22Y Security alert US embassy Doha, Shelter in place, Travel advisory To avoid region Recommend
wXMNDNyadOY Untitled Books: My husband John is a Senator Kennedy
bGrUFNfeOBo Man wins Presidential Medal of Freedom for missing the woman He dated and ex. Husband
M7h1tuBSAaU No love anticipated from Chicago windy city or Detroit 8 miles, Eminem burn #seo
bjdsRjfinfM How to crochet a free form star Random stitches and more 10LightStar01 is live!
8U1Yd92_9Tk Mirror Love Bird
RXg88dMgxf0 The dancing xenophobic xylophones, World stage collaboration
C2JpWEjuXB4 Happy Valentines Day from crochet Pup stitch
p5qNmwVz2d8 Google Meet calling replacing (legacy) Duo Exposes your phone number and email
Ln_4tmLAMSY Would a woman hire male lawyer knowing that he had cheated on his wife? #divorcelaw #divorcelawyer
a9IGBuS2a-E Logmei silly hairball dance
boavDBvWgjs Flashing police car drone lifts off from a top of very tall roof of a skyscraper.
jr_Yfh3y78c He set the country backwards with his domestic violent attitude with physical abuse towards me
WpBEkq0gPWw Untitled Remix
gPtMY579pjQ This guy is admitting he's purposely manipulating people by playing dumb frauds & scam
KzvNCrlxa8s Giant plushy octopus hugs couple
-pmCMnQut-E Police arrest ogoniff sleeping on mailbox Dropbox #firstamendment #DreamScreenAI #aperturefoundation
CKYUeWHFczo Lock him up , - No one is above the law
9pFR8UEBsxw The first steps, and last steps are not needed for the crochet heart pattern
PzdL5mn0Baw The blossoming love of the 2 colored people, He loves his wife so very much
pMFd1mZiJRk Grim Reaper & Reapress Get married, Do you abide by invisible threats control According to his rules
n4nf4bB-Jo8 When active duty military shows up to the space force
EYLww4NNraI Was this a mistake? Remembering the old spark, Caring For an abuser

Bitcoin Breaks $74K! Rebound Logic Explained

https://i.redd.it/gvyq9ftt9hpg1.jpeg

Every day Bitcoin is online & working its future potential value grows.

For context I work in Finance at a major institution. In my 30s. I'm no expert, nor can I read the tarot cards. But I think I do know more about how the financial system works than the average person.
I'm a secret bitcoiner, ie in the closet. If my bosses knew I had 75% of my net worth in BTC it would affect my chances of a promotion. They would look at me like a crazy person.

The software that I work on indexes the US GAAP rules. For those who don't know US GAAP (Generally Accepted Accounting Principles) are the standardized rules and guidelines that companies in the United States must follow when preparing and reporting their financial statements so that financial information is consistent, transparent, and comparable across organizations.

Back when the ETF was in the process of being approved and they publicly announced updates to the rule set to include language for Bitcoin I knew this was a HUGE DEAL. They don't just update these rules on a whim. I bought as much as I could afford. Prior my money was mainly in 2 pieces of real estate. But I was getting slowly bled out from taxes and insurance.
Bitcoin to me solved all of these problems, store of value, portable, can't print it, no dealing with renters, etc etc. From my studies in college I had a background in cryptography but I'm like a C student in a smart class of guys, where I can't solve any of the complex coding problems but I can read and understand it lol. And so when I read the white paper for BTC I went ghost white in my room and started panicking that I needed to get my position ASAP. At the time the price was 30k. The 30k price signaled to me that other smart people had also reached the same conclusions as me but not a critical mass of them yet otherwise the market cap and price would be way higher.
The bitcoin standard makes a ton of sense to me. We store "value" in all sorts of stupid crap just because it's "rare" and we collectively deem a thing to have value, examples would be pokemon cards, art and so on.

I mistakenly bought into these super cycle price predictions, thinking the banks and all the major players would start buying like mad men since Bitcoin is the only truly scarce asset. Although we did get tons of buying, we did not get it to the levels that would send the price soaring to 500k and beyond. Lately we've been taking a beating, but wait zoom out.

Something really cool happened.

Trillions flowed into gold in a short window and caused the price to move 200% up in a 2 year window. My friends and I were SUPER disappointed, as we expected bitcoin to be the asset that absorbed this capital. It ended up being a flight to gold, ugh, but that's not necessarily bad news for us.

Gold market cap went up $7–11 trillion over the last 24 months.
That is WILD that there is that much money just sloshing around the system in a way that it can flood into a shiny rock haha. In my opinion it's a question of WHEN not if that money goes into BTC. If a similar event was to occur in the Bitcoin market, and 7 trillion flows into it, the price could easily sail past 500k bear case. We've never actually had so much capital flow into it that it exhausts the available supply on exchanges. Here's some moon boy math for you, theirs about 1 million BTC on Coinbase Advanced (liquid supply). If you multiply that by today's price of 73k, you could in theory buy the entire supply for 73 billion, obviously it doesn't work this way because as you buy more the price would rise to ensure a price supply equilibrium, but it's good to use this example to illustrate how little bitcoin is for sale on Coinbase and how little money it would take to detonate the price to Pluto. 11 trillion would be a thermonuclear bomb going off on the price. Lord only knows what happens if that capital flow was to turn towards bitcoin. My entire portfolio is setup and waiting for that possible event.

It's just going to take longer than what we initially expected.

On the phone with my friend I was telling him think about this, gold has been around since the dawn of time, it has a confidence that was earned with humans through trust due to its crazy long history. I mean it's fascinating to think you could travel back to nearly any place at any time period with some gold coins and get some food and shelter. It's humanity's original money.

Now that makes me think, Bitcoin needs more time just existing. We are not going to store 37+ trillion of value into something that is only 17 years old. It's a baby. And when you think about how fast this baby has grown in 17 years 1.5 trillion total market cap that screams that humanity is embracing this new asset SUPER fast. We are just impatient creatures by nature, me included. I was dreaming about this apartment in Italy I wanted to buy back when we were smashing all time high after all time high.
But here we stand now, at 70s, and I had to think deeply about my convictions and I stand by them.